Last week we talked about the importance of waking other people’s brains up and I left you with a cliffhanger wondering how we do just that.
Clearly, it's been a loooonnnngggg week of waiting for you so...
Let's get right to it!
Charisma Tip #1
We tune out when we hear social scripts:
“How are you?”
“What do you do?”
“Where are you from?”
How many times have you heard these types of questions and done a humongous internal sigh?!
Talk about setting the bar so low that you don’t pull a muscle jumping over it.
C’mon people!
Charisma Tip #2
You need to wake up the other person’s brain.
Instead of immediately cueing others that you are boring, get their brain out of autopilot. Take those uninspiring, autopilot questions and Bob Ross them up a bit.
Instead of “How are you?” try something like:
“What’s the best thing that has happened to you today?”
“Got any fun plans coming up?”
Or for someone you haven’t seen in a while,
“What’s was the highlight of your year?”
Instead of “What do you do?” try:
“What personal passion projects are you working on?”
“Are you working on any exciting projects at work?”
Instead of “Where are you from?” try:
“What’s your story?”
“What is your city most known for?”
The reason these types of questions work is because they require the other person to scan their brain to think of an answer that is positive or fun!
Not only does it get them out of autopilot, it also adds some positivity to the mix.
And contrary to popular belief, professional doesn't have to be boring.
Charisma Tip #3
Professional doesn’t equal boring.
Professionals are people too and giving their brain a hit of joy and fun is a good thing.
An easy place to start is by thinking about your emails and texts. How can you make them more interesting?
- How about a snappy greeting or clever sign-off to your email?
- Adding a photo to your email signature (bonus points for a fun one!)
- Adding a clever subject line to your email
Adding humor in and showcasing a unique vantage point is a way to stand out and be viewed as charismatic. Adding a line or two of personality is usually enough to highlight you and allow you to be viewed as both professional and personable.
#Winning
Charisma Tip #4
Self-awareness is critical.
Having a solid understanding of how you show up in the world provides fabulous intel that can be leveraged to control your nonverbals productively.
Ask yourself the question, “When I show up, what shows up with me?”
In the digital world, this means that it’s time to think about the:
Words you are use
Colors
images
Profile pictures
Website layouts
Virtual backgrounds
In-person this means paying attention to your nonverbal communication including:
Body language cues
Vocal tone
Ornaments such as clothing, hair, accessories, make-up, shoes, etc.
Communication is more than just words!
Being intentional about your cues and sprinkling in some dashes of charisma helps make you a next level communicator.
Your co-pilot (who is cheering for you to be the interesting and charismatic person you are!),
P.S.
Your turn to spill the tea!
What’s your favorite question to ask someone?
Do you have any tips that you use to turn on the like switch?
What’s your favorite tip you use to be charming?
Do tell!