“Necessity is the mother of invention” – Plato
I adore people’s creativity and ingenuity and am filled with hope when I see new solutions and ideas being tried.
A shout out to these clever and charming attempts to connect while social distancing.
The Quarantine Curtain
The High Five Guard
The Social Distance Bike
What is Oxytocin you ask?
“Oxytocin is a hormone secreted by the posterior lobe of the pituitary gland, a pea-sized structure at the base of the brain. It’s sometimes known as the “cuddle hormone” or the “love hormone,” because it is released when people snuggle up or bond socially.”
Oxytocin is the hormone that is released when we connect with someone–both physically and mentally.
Think handshakes, hugs, and playing with our kids and pets,
along with activity bonding activities like hanging out with friends,
happy hour, eating out, etc..
Unfortunately, these activities are not pandemic friendly (sad trombone).
The New York Times recently came out with an article “How to Hug During a Pandemic” that gives the safety requirements to pull off a safe hug (just in case you don’t have the time to make a quarantine hug curtain!) Happily, there are other things you can do to up your oxytocin levels and get a daily dose of love and belongingness!
A few quick and easy, socially distanced approved, items include:
1. Make good eye contact.
At the risk of sounding like your mother, “listen with your eyes” instead of being glued to your electronic devices. Practice doing this while interacting with store workers (i.e. cashiers & baggers), talking with co-workers, greeting neighbors, and on Zoom calls (Tip: look at the camera light to mimic eye contact). Yes, making eye contact and truly seeing someone supplies a big boost!
2. Make small talk.
Just talking to a stranger while standing in line or giving a stranger a compliment has been shown to give us a hit of oxytocin. Full disclosure, I am from the Midwest so this seems completely normal to me! Yale Professor Laurie Santos details this (along with heaping servings of other strategies) in her podcast “The Happiness Lab”. Her content is magnificent and well worth the listen!
3. Give a little gift.
Just sending a card, small item, or encouraging note has been shown to increase oxytocin. Why not make someone’s day by taking a moment to send them something? One of my friends has taken to writing several notes a day to maintain her connections during the pandemic. I received a card in the mail with a beautiful note and origami heart and it had me smiling all day!
4. Listen to music.
You probably have noticed that listening to your favorites tunes can improve your mood, focus, and motivation. So go ahead and turn up the volume (unless it’s polka). It also improves the ability to create social bonds — an effect also associated with oxytocin.
5. Stay in contact with friends.
Taking time to connect even virtually has a profound effect on the connection. Social media proves to be a connector so go ahead and text, email, and Zoom away as a means to remain up to date and in the know with your loved ones. Virtual cocktail hours, Netflix watching parties, even virtual retreats (I just attended a virtual Summer Camp retreat and had a fabulous time meeting new friends and cabin mates–who knew it could be so fun?!) are easy ways to keep the oxytocin tap running.
Go ahead and start building up your oxytocin reserves!
We all need huge doses of this magic hormone so feel free to help yourself to second helpings.
Your co-pilot,
