“I just think it’s so funny. If they were conducting the same experiment but there were no cameras, they get 100 years in prison…It’s like sex trafficking”.
-John Wilson talking about watching “The Bachelor” and “The Bachelorette” on Conan O’Brien’s podcast
This was the quote that made me realize that John Wilson is a next level observer.
Today on my daily walk I was introduced to John Wilson via the podcast “Conan Needs A Friend”. What struck me the most during the interview was John’s keen interest in observing life and seeing things that many people miss. I hadn’t heard of John Wilson or his docuseries, yet I enjoyed the podcast banter and felt compelled to learn more about him.
So I went home and Googled him.
And since I don’t get HBO, I was left with clips of John Wilson on YouTube.
In one of the clips, John mentions that he used to watch video footage for a private investigator which meant sifting through hours and hours of banal videos to find one tiny incriminating moment. He cites this practice as teaching him how to observe things closely and ultimately the practice that honed his observational skills.
Question:
How does this relate to body language?
Answer:
Picking up on nonverbal cues is all about observation. The more you practice, the better you get.
My YouTube “research” led to several video clips.
I especially liked the one I saw about “How to Make Small Talk” where John talks about baiting which he defines as “wearing or doing something that will invite conversation”.
What he shares is true (and funny!) and really can be used to generate small talk.
He’s right when he says,
“This could be a fashion choice, method of transportation, the way you move, the way you eat, a new haircut… wearing a band T-shirt is a popular way to get people in public to talk to you…”
True Story.
I’ve lost track of the number of times my husband’s tennis T-shirts have started a conversation with other tennis lovers.
The back story is that my husband loves tennis and is involved in a local charity fundraiser in our city to maintain the local high school’s tennis courts. Each year T-shirts for the event are printed up and each year my husband wears them. Often.
We’ve had lively conversations with many tennis enthusiasts, met the mother of Luke and Murphy Jensen (twin brothers that garnered a lot of attention in the tennis world in the ’90s), and have even gotten souvenirs from professional tennis players as a result of his T-shirts.
Tip.
The more “Me too!” moments (the “I like it too” kind), the easier it is to have a conversation with someone you’ve just met.
Examples.
“You saw Dave Matthews in concert? Me too! He was great!”
“I love your dog. We have a Pomeranian, too!”
“Where did you get your recumbent bike? I’m looking for one too?”
Displaying these cues are signs to others that you have something in common. And these cues are great ways to begin or enter a conversation.
Our nonverbals speak volumes so being intentional about them is a golden opportunity.
Small talk is easier than you think.
|
Your co-pilot (who is considering a free trial to HBO so she can binge-watch “How to with John Wilson”), |
