“I’ll just have a Coke,” I say to the bartender.
“And I’ll have a hard cider,” my husband adds.
The bartender takes our order while looking simultaneously annoyed and disappointed by our requests.
I smile, comment on the baseball game, and try to turn on the “like switch” but he’s not having it.
I've clearly encountered a cold, prickly person.
You know, the aloof, unapproachable person you're forced to interact with to achieve your goals?
They’re everywhere and in a variety of situations!
- Restaurants (a la my recent bartender encounter)
- Stores (Hello short-staffed and overworked!)
- Work (Colleagues, Supervisors, Clients)
- Teenagers (Approximately 97.82% of them)
Often we don't have the capacity to respond in a friendly way. And sometimes we are just unaware of how are being perceived.
Warning!
If you’ve been told that you are:
- Hard to relate to
- Intimidating
- Unapproachable
- Cold…
You might be a cactus person.
And you may need help.
Happily, there are things you can do that make you much more trustworthy and welcoming.
Begin by considering your body language cues.
Do you:
Smile?
Wave?
Acknowledge people both verbally and nonverbally?
Do you offer to include others at:
Lunch?
Conferences?
In meetings?
Also, consider what your virtual nonverbals are saying about you.
Do you:
Have a profile picture on your email signature?
Use pronouns?
Have a welcoming voicemail message?
Have a friendly auto-response message?
Do an audit of how you are showing up both in-person and in the virtual world.
Ask yourself the questions:
“What is my (website, brand, online presence, etc.) saying about me?”
“When I show up, what shows up with me?”
Why does this matter?
Well, even though...
- You might be having a bad day.
- You might feel awkward interacting with others.
- You might be distracted with a million things on your mind
It still doesn’t matter BECAUSE…
Perception is all that matters.
If you wish to make a good impression and build relationships with others, it’s critical that you master your body language and nonverbal communication.
Because no one wants to hug a cactus!
An "Animal" maybe, but not a cactus!
Your co-pilot (who prefers a warm, squishy hug!),
P.S.
Does this sound like you?
Cacti may have prickers, but they are also resilient, resourceful, and independent.
*And they look both regal and adorable in pots*
If you want to learn more, send me an email at kristin@bodylanguageblueprints.com