"Whoa, pause the movie," I say to my husband.
We are midway through the movie “The Banshees of Inisherin” when the text comes through.
Our "faraway daughter" from Turkey is messaging us that she has just experienced a massive earthquake and is feeling terrified.
It’s early morning her time and her normally well-written message is showing signs of stress and of English being her second language.
“We’re good but we felt it so bad and it was so scary and my head is spinning it is crazy, there are some cities that were affected worse people are dead and they are waited to be found and it is 5 am and it’s raining/snowing everywhere. i hope nothing bigger happens than this” she writes.
And instantaneously my heart drops. There is nothing I can do but listen and offer support.
If she were here, I would immediately drive to Culver’s and buy her a Chocolate Oreo Concrete Mixer. It’s her favorite treat and it got her through many ups and downs of being an exchange student in the USA.
Because frozen custard always helps.
feel helpless but as the hours and days unfold we are able to talk and reaffirm her safety and connect with her and her family.
She sends us voice messages and we send ice cream pictures.
As a host family, we have learned that bringing a student into your life expands your world. Not only does the student become a member of your family, but the entire family often becomes part of your world.
- So when earthquakes, and tsunamis happen, we get called.
- When family and friend dynamics happen, we get called.
- Dating issues, we get called.
- When challenging events like an illness or death happen, we get called.
- And bad weather occurs (hello Artic blasts), we get called.
- And when Netflix puts out the show Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story, we get called (“you mean I lived in Wisconsin and didn’t know this?!”)
It's how we are hard-wired.
It's human connection.
Knowing other people care about you and have your back is what makes life meaningful.
This is why emotional intelligence is at the heart of everything.
Knowing how you show up and being able to connect and read the cues of others matters.
In brief…
It's the connections and relationships we have in life that truly matter.
Personally.
Professionally.
Romantically.
Which is why the pain of saying goodbye after a year of hosting a student is still worth it. Just knowing that others care justifies the sad farewell.
It’s worth the connection.
Because in an earthquake, sharing an ice cream photo is still a way to connect.
Even though, it still makes your heart melt.
Trying to burn off the calories from our ice cream indulgences.
Your co-pilot (who probably should go to Culvers in an act of solidarity),
