Have you ever met someone only to learn later they are not who you thought?
I saw the video below several years ago and was reminded of it again recently during a conversation with a friend.
And it got me thinking.
How many times do my preconceived notions affect my interactions?
If you haven't taken the time to watch the video, here's a quick recap.
- Six photographers are asked to photograph a man.
- Each photographer is told something different about him.
That he is:
An ex-inmate
A psychic
A commercial fisherman
A millionaire
A former alcoholic
And, that he saved someone’s life
- They all photograph him.
- The pictures each photographer captures are very different images of the man.
(Gasp!)
This begs the question, "How do our preconceptions and first impressions affect our viewpoint?"
Fun fact about me.
My first job out of college was working with adults with developmental disabilities. It was a job I enjoyed so much that I stayed for 26 years!
And it’s where I learned a lot about people and about nonverbal communication.
One thing that always stood out to me, however, was the labels given to some of the clients and the homes where they resided.
Staff would say things like:
She’s really challenging.
That’s a difficult home.
He’s complicated.
She’s so stubborn.
That’s an easy house.
It shouldn’t be surprising that “difficult” homes had a harder time keeping staff and that “challenging” clients were often given more directives than choices.
The way we label someone affects the way we "see" them.
And what we see is often our understanding of who we believe the person to be.
We do this when we attach words to people.
The way we talk about, introduce, and interact with them is impacted by the words we use.
And these words become a part of our first impression.
Deep thoughts.
First impressions matter. And words matter.
Have you considered how you are setting others up for success by the words you use with and about them?
Do you know how you are showing up?
Take a moment to reflect on...
- Where you have seen this happen in your life
- How you can use this reminder to help see people differently
- How facial expressions and nonverbal cues impact your perception of others
Your co-pilot who thinks you’re smart (and who is trying to use more positive words to label and reframe people and situations),
P.S.
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